Hartford

Hartford: Thirty-eighth session: Amir

(1)

Albert informed us about his latest talk with Cartwright. Apparently, he already knew about Chaitan’s plans and he now wanted to stop them. Albert said that we had to frame them, so that they would meet the Sheriff’s fireplace, so to speak. Well, at least we won’t have to engage them in direct combat (hopefully). Mark said that Tamas had told him he wanted to leave Chaitan the moment the mission was over, so he went to write Cartwright a letter in an attempt to spare Tamas’ life. Albert told me he wanted to talk to Rhea in private, so I went to help Mark. Although, I have to admit, I was rather surprised. I didn’t know we had secrets between us. At the same time – why shouldn’t we? Sure, we are a team, but we are also four individuals, therefore it’s not surprising we form different ties with each other.

When Mark was finished with the letter, Albert joined us and I decided it was an appropriate time to apologize for my actions back when my Nosferatu curse kicked in (it’s still so frustrating!). To my relief, they weren’t angry at me. I also told Mark that I wanted to apologize to Uosis as well, and what do you know? He appeared right after I said that. I was hoping for that, actually. I wanted my apology to be personal. What I didn’t want, however, was for him to analyze me, which was typical of him, of course, although I did hope he’d make an exception that time. But he didn’t. I hate that ibn haram. The problem is, this topic is still an open wound to me and as much as I hate to admit it, I almost broke emotionally in front of him. This place, this life (or should I say – miserable existence) messed me up pretty bad… I managed to hold myself together, but Uosis seemed to notice that and he tried to pry even more. I hate it when people do that. Is it so hard to mind your own business? It’s not rocket science…

Mark asked Uosis if he could possess one of the Indian vampires, and they all started giving suggestions on what to do with it. Uosis said that a “controlled experiment” is required to test his ability to put a vampire into frenzy and Mark chose Albert as the guinea pig. He said it was because Albert was the weakest, although the more I think about it, the less sense it makes. If we are to pull a stunt like that on Arshad, shouldn’t we have chosen the “strongest” of us? In any case, Albert agreed. All we had to do was hope that nothing bad would come from that.

(2)

I asked Mark whether Ordo members were experimenting on humans. Not asked, confronted him about it. He said that pretty much every higher member was doing it. Of course… He also said it wasn’t compulsory. Like, I had a choice. Did I really? That all depended on whether my mentor allowed me to keep my principals. I got angry. Well, not I’m-gonna-snap-your-neck angry, but angry enough to start questioning my trust in the man before me. He was making excuses. I asked why he didn’t tell me this when he was convincing me to join. He said I didn’t ask. I asked him what else he didn’t tell me. He said that was pretty much it. I took a minute to process all of what had happened in that conversation and I decided that I shouldn’t be too angry at Mark. Maybe he honestly thought it was a detail not worth mentioning. But more importantly I’m surprised how I didn’t think of that myself. It now seems so obvious. How can the Dragons do their research on transcending the vampire condition without such experiments? But it didn’t make me feel any better. I needed to talk to Rosmari Kerol about this, I needed to know where she stood on the issue.

I saw that Mark was uncomfortable with the conversation, so I decided to change the topic. I don’t hate the guy. I guess I was a little angry, but he doesn’t deserve any condescending crap. I decided to share my suspicions about seeing Arshad and Barbara talk on more than one occasion. Mark thought they were talking about Circle of the Crone. They could be. What if Barbara has an idea where the Crypt of Mithra could be? Or maybe they can use blood magic to track its whereabouts? Another thought had crossed my mind, yet it seemed a little far fetched. Albert told us that Cartwright already knew about the Crypt of Mithra. Could it be that we weren’t the only kiddie poolers on the “quest” of spying on the hindus?

(3)

This was the day of Uosis’s “controlled experiment”. Albert was placed in one of the cells. Uosis talked to him, asked him questions. Suddenly, Uosis asked a very peculiar question. He asked Albert which one of us he hated. Albert said he didn’t hate us, but Uosis insisted to pick one he disliked the most, and it happened to be me. My first thought was “Is it because I don’t like cats?”, but there must be more to it. I decided not to jump to conclusions, just when Uosis appeared before me, asking how Albert’s answer made me feel. What does that have to do with anything? I think that guy is just messing with us… I said I didn’t think he really hated me. What else was I supposed to say? Oh no, I’m so sad, I think I should commit ritual suicide? I like Albert and again, I don’t think he really meant it. Or at least I’d like to think he didn’t.

After a while, Albert said that the experiment was over and asked us to let him out. I asked Uosis if it was safe to do so. He said yes and disappeared. I guess I should have interpreted it as a sign of trouble, but I didn’t. And boy was that a mistake. The first thing Albert did when he got out was to run to Rhea and start kissing her. He was apologizing as well. I wanted to help Rhea, but then I saw that she had it under control – she skillfully eluded his grapple. Albert, on the other hand, ran upstairs, which Mark and I attempted to prevent immediately. I managed to catch him and Mark helped me restrain him. We held him for a while, and then… I came to by the clinic door, naked. I don’t even remember what I thought at that moment. Was that Albert’s doing? Well, if it is, I should’ve known better than let my guard down – that’s what you get for looking a Ventrue in the eyes. Rhea opened the door and handed me my clothes.

Later Albert was put into a cell once again, until he (hopefully) recovered. I wonder if he remembered what happened to him.

(4)

Rhea called and told me that she was coming to the clinic with someone who will help us get the clinic running. She came with a man whom she introduced as Daisuke, and Rebeka. Mark and I showed Daisuke the basement and told which parts would be theirs and which – ours. And then Daisuke told Rhea that she could “choose a place for the lesson”. The what now? Albert and Mark seemed to be just as confused as I was, while Rhea told her friend about a place in the woods where she’d trained with Rebeka a couple of times. We gathered in that place, and Daisuke and Rebeka prepared for a fight. Alright, that was weird… Wasn’t he human? If so, he had nothing on Rebeka, or so I thought… He punched Rebeka so hard, she fell on the ground, gasping for air. I think he broke something… What was that about? I suspect it had something to do with Rebeka’s rudeness, but whatever she said or did, I’m sure she didn’t deserve it. And the punch itself. Where did Rhea get this guy from? A Tarantino movie?

(5)

I met with Rosmari Kerol at the hotel. I’d contemplated different possibilities of what she might be like over the past few days, and lucky for me, she seemed nice. I asked her about the experiments, and she pretty much said what Mark had told me, only in a more eloquent way. Although she pointed out that due to the difference between the vampires and the humans, not everything can be achieved via such experimentation. It didn’t make me feel any better. Knowing that my mentor isn’t a blood-thirsty creep was a relief, though. I needed to make a decision, and I needed to make it at that moment. And I chose to proceed. Yes, I am against human experimentation, but I can’t swing about left and right every time I am presented with an obstacle. I have a goal to become better than a mere vampire, and although Rosmari doesn’t think so, I think it means becoming more human. Sure, this goal stops sounding so noble when you realize that many humans are worthless scum, but I don’t want to become like any human; I want to be the human I was before I was cursed, or at least get to it as close as possible. Hopefully I won’t have to be a monster on my way there…

Rosmari informed me that I was to be under Tina’s tutelage until I mastered my first coil. She also said that she had already arranged it with Tina, which really surprised me. Had she made up her mind before even meeting me? Or did she care so little? In any case, I’ve known Tina to be one of the most reasonable kindred in the kiddie pool, so I think it was a positive turn of events.

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Griautis My_cabages

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